Yet another disappointment ....
Well, Deloitte came back yesterday with the news that they have identified an internal resource to take up this position and is not considering me for now. However, since my CV was highlighted and liked hence they would contact me with any suitable future opportunities ...
In plain and simple words - this too didn't work out and imagine the reason. I clearly felt that there is perhaps no other excuse left for me not making it. Atleast - I can't think of one. Hopefully, this is the end and the next opportunity will click!
Keeping my fingers (and everything else) crossed.
Last week details
I can’t really figure out what’s keeping me from losing all that mass although I feel much lighter these days. I haven’t hit another plateau – I can’t keep getting there every one kg. However, on close monitoring the weight machine, there is a fluctuation every 6 hours or so. Looks like its true – I need to put extra effort to achieve anything in life while others get there much easily. BTW, our friend has stated that she would get there much easily almost ridiculing me for spending 2.5 years to get here – which is fine, just firms up my resolve as the journey (to lose 10 kgs more) will be much tougher. However, I wish that it will take me much lesser than 2.5 years to lose the balance 10 kgs. Otherwise, this week was rather ordinary – no news or further developments on the career front. Deloitte is ambivalent. Perhaps they will decide one way or the other by this week. I can hope and pray that things work out for me. I can’t imagine why I should be ‘rejected’ because both my rounds went well. However, such doubts cross your mind when things are against you. The incidents over the past few weeks have left a severe dent on my confidence level. I have started feeling that nothing ever will be the same again... Now for a change – I wanted to do a few film reviews. I have always resisted doing the same as plenty of good reviews are available on the net. I watched ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ which is the toast of the season – what with so many awards and nominations in its kitty. It is certainly and well told story and the conceptualization is superb – the best I have seen in recent times. I loved the intelligent way in which each question was interlinked with the life of the protagonist. Though, I won’t say that the portrayal of slums and the life of its dwellers were called for given the image crisis that India faces today. However, with due respect to Rehman – I don’t feel this composition was quite as good as we are used to. It might have won him the ‘Golden Globe’ and 3 oscar nominations but ... well he has set high standards for himself. I strongly feel that ‘Ghazini’ and more so Aamir Khan deserves praise for the kind of effort that went into making this movie. It was an old story well told but I couldn’t digest the violence depicted in this movie. No wonder he was deservedly awarded the ‘Entertainer of the year award’ organized by NDTV. The other movie I saw was ‘Chandni Chowk to China’ which was a disappointment as far as movie making was concerned – the plot dished out was mediocre even my mainstay ‘masala’ movie standards. However, the kids loved the 3 hour long entertainment if we overlook the glaring flaws in storytelling. Given the big banner and background of the cast and crew – they should have done a better job.
Well, now I move into the last week of my course at the institute – I will have more to recount on the course and if I received any further help to install the sql software!
About the third week of this month:
Well, another 10 days sped past without there being too many changes in life. Someone predicted that the beginning of the new year would bring about a ‘deflation in the spirit’. And the news came which I shared with you in my earlier post that my candidature was rejected. The HR, Sreeja confirmed the same and it was so disheartening that I spent the rest of the week mourning and morose since during these hard days – you never know when opportunity will knock at your door next.
There was another update to this episode when Twinkle came back to me the next day and impressed upon me the fact that this company has the habit of re-thinking and hiring the earlier ‘rejected’ candidate. Now, I recall Sreeja having mentioned that they are not going ahead with me ‘as of now’. I requested Twinke to place my CV for other suitable openings but I am not sure if she would. I didn’t get the chance to mull over the missed opportunity as there were other calls back to back. The second round went well but one never knows – they could be looking at more candidates. Last heard, we need to wait till this weekend before we hear anything further and HR has promised to keep me informed. Again, I am told that there would be a Solar eclipse somewhere in my chart around the 26th after which things are going to start improving.
On the personal front, there have been some occasions and family gatherings over the last 10 days. Piklu’s father-in laws passed away in the first week of this month (may his soul rest in peace) and his last rites were completed in Kolkata but the mourning period was completed with ceremonial get togethers. Thankfully, kaku and kakima were here to support the family during this hour. He visited us on the Sankranti day which we observed with the serving of traditional food. Aruna and Rajan have been visiting us often and all is not well with Rajan too as nothing has worked out so far.
The event of the month was our 12th wedding anniversary which is officially celebrated on the 19th. It was rather low key this time but friends were there throughout.
Well, other than that – life is quite normal – an even pace which I don’t enjoy. Hope I could do something to change things around ... any ideas?
The hectic first 10 days ...
I feel the need to include an addendum to my list of resolutions which I posted earlier this month. •To take concrete steps to achieve greater expertise in the field of marketing research.
This becomes important especially after I got rejected by a company on the grounds that my statistical knowledge was not strong enough to add value to this role and ‘mentor’ a team of primary research professionals. Now, it remains to be seen is how they will get a balance of research and statistics in one person with hands on experience in SPSS tool. Doesn’t concern me now .... but I feel a little let down after a lot of hopes were pinned on this opportunity. The Bangalore trip on the 7th Jan went off without any hitch. In fact everything was as smooth as can be ... the flight was an hour late which kind of upset the schedule a bit but otherwise it was all well. I quite liked the lady there and also another gentleman named Rajendra who is the VP there. However, the interview did not go on well as I discovered later in the evening. The seeds of doubts were sowed when my client call which was to happen at 7 pm got cancelled. The last round with Umang (another lead) was the one which spoilt everything ... the questioning was akin to grilling which is used to happen during analyst days. I strongly feel that peer interview shouldn’t be part of the recruitment process ... I don’t know if any company does it but it is uncalled for especially in case where the candidate is chosen and thereafter they need to work together. Anyways, there is no use fretting over a lost opportunity. I have to pick up the threads and keep going ...
There still seems to be a little ray of hope I can hold on to ... another opportunity is still open ... or so I think. I had a call on Friday late night. Here again things are at a preliminary stage with 2 more rounds to go provided I clear this one. Since these days nothing works out in my favour I will desist from saying that everything was good ... One never knows these days but the profile and experience is pretty much what I have done earlier at MT. Even the timings are EST zone ... Anyways, let’s see. If it helps to keep my fingers crossed ... I will do so. It seems I have to cope with my share of upsets these days but it has been a very busy year so far ... full of activities.
Among the other highlights – baba has undergone the cataract operation and is doing well. He still has to follow instructions for the post operative care so that he recovers completely and in time. Didunma is affected with bed sores and is badly suffering. Mummy sounds so depressed and pitiful when she talks about her constant cries of pain and one wonders what the future holds for us all. Almost an anticlimax to the kind of life she led in her prime. God ... please have mercy on her and keep us away from doing wrong lest we are not tormented like her during our last days.
New Year Resolutions!!!
I am 3 days late in documenting my resolutions for this year which means I have lost 3 days in actually making them work – however, some of these have been occupying my mind over the last few days and instinctively I have started following them. Now I feel the need to put it down electronically& nbsp;for my reference.
So another year has just flown past and while I sit to take stock of my life – I feel that precious time is running out and there is a need to act fast to fulfil the ambitions and dreams I need to realize. 2008 has in many ways been a year of mixed experiences – one which the industry and political experts would love to sweep under the carpet as a year best forgotten. However, we must not miss the valuable lessons such experiences present before us – savour the joys, the highs and good times of victory, celebration, love and adulation. I have seen re-runs of the year gone by on TV and feel that it has been a dramatic year. Give the economic slowdown, power struggle, war and hostility, terror and hatred raging across the continents. We also experienced highs when an Indian won an individual gold at the Olympics for the first and others who emulated their counterparts and surpassed their personal records. Saina Nehwal broke into the World Top 10 in women’s badminton and promises to do better this year. Viswanathan Anand, the chess maestro won the World Championship yet again and of course the many laurels and accolades won by the Indian Cricket team which stands in the threshold of another glorious year as serious contenders to the number one ranking in both versions of the game. We already know that they are the reigning world champions of 20-20 cricket.
On the personal front, a few things went fine but I had to cope with a very difficult phase in my life. However, as I pledge to overcome the setbacks that have hampered my progress this year. My aim is to chart out a road map for this year in order to enable me to get there.
But first, a quick review of last year’s resolutions:
I think I have been partially successful this year as far as fulfilling my resolutions are concerned... in some cases it was not the lack in efforts but rather the situations being out of control that resulted in partial success.
Firstly, I received the biggest setback in my career in August due to being dismissed summarily from my job. I am till today grappling with the impact of that one decision which brought my world crashing down. I have introspected, reflected, pondered and even admonished myself for letting the situation get to this level, I have searched for answered on how I could have salvaged the situation but the solution still eludes me. As Bharat, Dimple and Bala have told me – it is not my fault but a blow of fate and the best course is to come to terms with it and get on with my career. After a lot of soul searching and subsequently looking for a suitable opening in the job market – I am still nowhere close to finalizing one. So, the promotion which I was aiming at sounds rather farfetched now. More on this topic, I keep reserved for the future.
Secondly, on the weight loss programme – I have done a descent job by others standard but didn’t live upto my expectations. I am much fitter and there seems to be a semblance of the woman’s figure – nowhere near the hour glass though. However, I take inspiration from the past and work towards a better results. As they say, miles to go before I sleep – though sleep, I won’t. My diet plan is much better but I need to strictly follow the weekly once salad and fruit diet.
I managed to let go of the past rather had to cope up with a situation forced onto me somewhere in June. I have suffered so much pain thereafter that till today I try to vigorously drive some disturbing thoughts out of my mind. This year I firmly resolve to permanently overcome this and need to have more control over my mind.
That kind of sums up everything ... 2008 wasn’t a good year. I feel it has taken me backwards – by how much remains to be seen. However, it has inflicted some lifelong lessons that I need to take heed of as I move forward. So here are the promises for the New Year, rather the resolutions –
1. & nbsp; Devote more time to spirituality. I have made a start already but now I need to take it to the next level. I will continue to read the “Bhagwad Geeta” and the “Hanuman Chalisa” atleast 15 minutes daily.
2. & nbsp; I need to follow the teachings in “The monk who sold his Ferrari” and plan the day in the morning and reflect on the day at night. Would ideally note the achievement, failures, learning etc in the day. I now feel serious reflection should not be left till the end of the year or when a situation crops up. I wish to chronicle this in my weekly account on the blog. This needs discipline and rigour I promise to do that.
3. & nbsp; I need to enhance my personality through reading good books. My aim is to read atleast one book a month and then write the book review. I plan to read both fiction and non- fiction which can be easily achieved but the challenge would be to balance them.
4. & nbsp; I would also like to spend some quality time with family and friends at the end of each week but this would largely depend on where I manage to get a job and if I manage to relocate my family also to that city.
5. & nbsp; I want to seriously keep tabs on my expenses which hopefully I will keep curtailed. I don’t want to sound thrifty but these days it is not a bad word.
6. & nbsp; Will continue with the works – healthy living, fitness, beauty and hopefully even start meditation sometime later this year. My weight loss target is 57 kgs which somehow seems doable given the regime that I am following. Just a little bit of an effort and more discipline.
7. & nbsp; I need to keep a stronger control over my mind and the thought process. It should be channelized in the right direction – which is more creativity and productivity. To let go finally and completely. I need a little bit of divine intervention here ...
Finally, I end with a little prayer and to seek the Almighty’s blessings so that I can achieve what I have set out to do this year. I need His help so that there are not too many unexpected situations out of my control without there being a workaround like it happened last year.